GETTING LOST

"Part of the finding is getting lost."

I'm not sure but if I remember right the author said the above and I agree. I can follow this path right into the maze where I will certainly get lost. Hopefully, I will also find myself. I read this in my second, or is it third, rereading of Sue Bender's "Everyday Sacred." If you haven't read it, I encourage you to do so.

When writing, I feel I must research, read, listen to others, and keep an open mind to find the answers. To my amazement, I often find those answers just as often when I get away from the screen or the page, and wander, stroll, even seem lost.

Maybe because I am a woman of an era when women were expected to stay home, have babies and keep their mouths shut (that certainly wasn't me, at the encouragement of my mother who was one of them, except for the mouth part). Though I had much more freedom that the prior generation, those old teachings aren't far from the surface. I strive to be an independent woman but I also feel driven to be a good wife, mother, a proper housekeeper, and caregiver to everyone who needs me. I need to get lost.

I need to lose myself in my writing, in a good book, in association with other creative people. I must allow myself time to dedicate myself to this love for words when I need to. I should stomp my feet and demand that I be given the time.

As you might know, it's not so easy to lose yourself.